About two weeks ago, I did something I never imagined I would do…
I launched my first children’s book.
After the success of my first art book The Adventures of Bits and Bobbles, I decided to turn Ivy’s story into a book as well. And here’s where it gets a little uncomfy…
I got cocky.
I’ve had many requests over the years to write children’s books, so I imagined launching one would be a sure thing. The launch of my first art book far surpassed my expectations, so I imagined this one would, too.
And it didn’t.
I was served a big ol’ slice of humble pie as the first few days of sales moved at snail speed. To cover the costs of actually printing the book, I needed to sell 80 of them… and by day 7 I’d sold around 30.
To be honest, I felt like an absolute failure. This endeavor had taken me so many months (and so much fear-facing) to bring to life, and every time a friend or family member asked me how the launch was going, I was reminded of how unsuccessful my efforts had been.
Until my mindset shifted.
You see, I’d been praying SO HARD for this sale to go well. For the Lord to make my efforts a success. And to be honest, I felt a little hurt, a little ignored. But as the days passed with my sales far beneath my original expectations, it called into question what “success” really means to me.
Is success a certain number of sales? Is success a certain amount of money? Is success an award-winning book?
Or is success over-coming my doubts around narrative writing? Is it writing a book I will be proud to read to my niece? Is it sharing a story that may only reach a small number of kids, but might truly have a lasting impact in their lives?
And when I thought about it like that, my fears and frustrations around the sales began to fall away. I may not have sold as many copies as I hoped I would, but the possibility of bringing a little bit of hope and encouragement to even one kid makes all the effort worth it.
At the end of the day, I have to trust that the Lord gave me this story for a reason and that what He chooses to do with it is the VERY BEST plan. And most importantly, I needed the reminder that this book (and EVERY piece of art I create!) is for His glory, not my own.